Sometimes moving on from a relationship can feel like going through withdrawal, knowing that if this person reached back out to you, it’s likely you wouldn’t be able to resist them even though it would undermine the progress you’d made in quitting them. An attachment to a person can be similar to addiction — the craving for their presence can be all-consuming and difficult to overcome, even knowing that they are not good for you.
“Blue Bedroom”, the title track off of singer Veronica Mansour’s first EP, brings us on a sorrowful, climactic journey as she struggles to get away from a turbulent relationship.
The song opens with a soft, nostalgic piano intro as Mansour’s bell-like but haunting voice sings of the past:
Memories blurred
Tried to push you down
And forget you
…
The last time you were here
I tried to make clear that you’re to blame
Set me up in flames
Mansour poetically addresses this past romance, trying to make clear the pain that this person caused her, and that she is still not fully over them even though she’s “tried” to push those memories away.
As we approach the chorus, the piano slowly dwindles to be replaced by drawn out, dramatic, almost synth-like horns as Mansour dejectedly describes what seeing this person again would do to her:
I’m shaking
Please not again
I know I’ll make it through
But another fight with you
I just can’t take
Find somebody new
There’s nothing here for you
I can’t hide from you
In my blue bedroom
These lyrics really paint the picture of Mansour’s reaction to this person’s return. It’s not just a mental breakdown, but a more visceral, physical reaction. She is “shaking”, begging him to leave her alone, because she doesn’t want to fall into repeating old mistakes. The chorus really grabs us at the end after the music has built, only to weaken as she reveals that she is stuck drowning – the “blue” gives us imagery of sadness and being underwater – in her memories of this person.
In the next verses, Mansour continues to emphasize her desperation:
I can’t escape
The voice that plagues my mind
Until the dawn
I’m begging
…
Torture somebody new
The use of the words “torture”, “plagues”, and “begging” reaffirms the suffering and hopelessness this relationship brought into Mansour’s life. Her pleads are reinforced by the backup vocals repeating them, as well as the theatrically arranged production that makes us feel like we are watching her sing this ballad from a dark, blue-lit stage with the instruments’ sounds coming from the orchestra pit.
“Blue Bedroom” is an immersive musical experience: the heartfelt lyrics, impressive vocals, and climactic production force you to empathize with Mansour’s experience and really feel the emotions she’s portraying.