Pinegrove takes inspiration from a red square in an envelope, and starts a deeper conversation about communication, and the ways in which we share our feelings.

This New Jersey band hits hard, both in subject matter and sound. Their Indie rock style is sometimes labeled as “emo” due to their raw, deep reaching lyrics, and with heavy notes of folk, this genre bending makes for a compelling listen. Pinegrove’s “Cadmium” from their breakout 2016 album Cardinal pulls back the curtain on the impossible process of saying how you feel.

“Cadmium”’s swirling introduction surrounds us with the frustration of inexpression. The increasing restlessness in lead singer Evan Stephens Hall’s voice reaches the universal feeling of not being able to find the words.

Inspired by the book I Send You This Cadmium Red by John Berger and John Christie, “Cadmium” explores the different ways we can communicate. Hall tells the publication The Fader that the book follows letters that Berger and Christie sent to each other.

Hall says, “The first letter sent was just a square of that color. I was writing a lot of letters with my friend out west at the time, and we liked the idea. We started sending colors and art sometimes, and found it to be a different and good (and sometimes more direct) way to say what we were feeling.”

To “say what it is” must sometimes not be said, but drawn, photographed, or sung. A cadmium red square may better encompass a feeling than any sentence could.

Shirt collar wringing me out, and my collarbone got all red.

And already severing prose I wrote, so I sing instead

There is a bit of a disconnect at the start of the song, the guitar and vocal emphases are slightly different, it isn’t “off” so much as it is layered. The musical components echo each other in a spiraling illustration of inner turmoil. This adds to the feeling of restlessness and explores musically the lyrical theme of disjointedness between emotion and communication.

Just as the intro hits the 2 minute mark, we are sucked into Pinegrove’s deep emotional groove with a melting bassline. The transition into power chords pulls us from the floating, hesitant beginning into an angrier chorus.

The tempo shifts as Hall reaches into the higher register of his voice for this ear catching chorus:

Say what it is

It’s so impossible

But if I just say what it is it tends to sublimate away

Articulating a feeling or a thought is not an impossible task, but it’s worrying to think that our emotions won’t be received with the importance they deserve if they aren’t communicated just right. Pinegrove proves themselves wrong with “Cadmium”, and gives us a powerful musical ode to the expressive paralysis that comes when you have something to say that is too big for words.

Beyond a single feeling, Pinegrove seeks to examine and reckon with emotions deep inside of us all, often the ones we keep in dark corners and try to ignore.

More every year, I shine a light on edges I tried to unfeel

but we gotta do better than that

Let’s take this as a reminder that we don’t just have our words, and looking at our emotions through the lens of art can make them easier to reveal, and easier to accept.

Listen to Cadmium here and check out Pinegrove’s newest album Amperland, NY.